1. Remember that anger and love are two sides of the same coin
If you really want love in your life, you must be willing to spend a little time with love's less comfortable relatives, anger and pain. It's common to think that with anger and pain come breakup and divorce. But the bottom line is the more you love someone, the more able they are to piss you off. So be aware: Anger and intense emotion are normal when you truly love and care. Mel McDaniel sings about this two-sided coin in "Anger and Tears":
Anger and tears, anger and tears
Is that all that's left of us after loving all these years
As slowly as love grows how soon it disappears
In a house full of anger and a heart full of tears
Remember, true strength is being able to work through the anger rather than letting the anger work through you.
2. Before you lash out, look within
When you're struggling with anger, it's common to blame others for every little thing. A true sign of strength is taking responsibility for yourself. In "Startin' with Me," Jake Owen comes to a very yogic resolution to dealing with anger:
If I had a dime for half the things I did that didn't make no sense at all
I'd be living a little higher on the hog
If only I'd have known
That later on down the road
I'd look back and not like what I see
I'd have changed a lot of things
Startin' with me
3. Practice feeling without reacting
The 6,000-year old practice of yoga teaches that when you are in challenging situations, you make the best decisions in even the worst of situations if you just breathe and relax. Try it: Lift your arms to the sides of your body and hold them so you form a letter "T." Allow your arms to stay parallel to the ground for 2, 3, even 4 minutes. When your shoulders start to burn, notice that by breathing and relaxing, you gain more endurance. There's very little that physical strength, hustle, and effort can do you for you in this situation. As a famous Zen proverb reads: "Nothing on earth can overcome an absolutely nonresistant person."
What's the secret to long-term success on your latest venture? Keeping a sense of humor, especially if things don't go as planned. Any difficulties you encounter simply mean a new part of your life is being born.
